Helldivers 2 is something special.

Nobody else is doing in-game propaganda like Helldivers 2. Every in-world word you read in HD2 is, ostensibly, written by the government of Super Earth; the fascistic government in charge of the Helldivers.

It’s also funny! So that’s what we’re going for here. Mission description dialogue for each of the the game’s three enemy factions. It’s outlandish in tone but has to keep the mission objectives clear and concise.